What A Show!

by Julia Griffin “A United Airlines passenger was taken into custody Thursday morning at Chicago’s O’Hare International Airport after opening an aircraft door and walking out onto the wing of the plane while it was taxiing.” —CNN I hate to produce such a scare, But waiting I just cannot bear; So I pushed through a […]

Growing Minds

by Julia Griffin “Bigger classes? Yes, but pupils have got bigger too, say UK teachers Union delegates say walking into class is like entering the land of the giants” —The Guardian I press my shirt, I pack my bag, I clasp my parking pass, And off I set for Brobdingnag To teach my morning class. […]

Nuke Reign

by Julia Griffin One wicked man is all it takes: One appetite that nothing slakes, Which somehow went unseen before. Now Europe shivers to its core To see such elevated stakes. Some horror every morning wakes The Western conscience till it aches, And nobody can now ignore One wicked man. Though all his promises are […]

Unfavorite Things

by Julia Griffin “Giuliani, the former mayor of New York City and former personal attorney for ex-President Donald Trump, appeared on Wednesday’s episode of the Fox singing show in a jack-in-the box costume. He belted ‘Bad to the Bone.’” —NBC News How much—besides one greasy grin— We’d lose of what this land rues By trading […]

The Thirds Man

by Julia Griffin “Arkansas man who awoke from 19-year coma in 2003 has died aged 57” —The Guardian From 1965, he saw The waking world till ’84, Then fell asleep, aged just nineteen, Until ’03. How fresh and green He was for one of thirty-eight! He revelled in his wakeful state With eager eyes; alas, […]

Convergence

by Julia Griffin “112m-year-old dinosaur tracks damaged in Utah by construction machinery” —The Guardian (with apologies to Thomas Hardy) I In a solitude of the clay, Where cattle do not stray, Nor those great beasts that made them, sadly crumble they. II A site once marked by hops From some triceratops Now ranks among earth’s […]

Slime Time

by Julia Griffin “A robot made of magnetic slime could be deployed inside the body to perform tasks such as retrieving objects swallowed by accident.” —New Scientist on Twitter “[It] could be useful in the digestive system, for example in reducing the harm from a small swallowed battery.” —The Guardian A robot of magnetic slime […]

Thump-Tub Gin

by Julia Griffin “Calls have erupted for ethical conflict-of-interest rules on America’s top court after it was revealed that Ginni Thomas, wife of the supreme court justice Clarence Thomas, pressed Donald Trump’s White House chief of staff to overturn the results of the 2020 presidential election.” —The Guardian Carry me back to old Virginni: That’s […]

Fossil Power

by Julia Griffin “Companies that divest from fossil fuel could face a state boycott in Texas” —NPR (with apologies to The Beatles) Ah, look at all the phony people! Ah, look at all the phony people! Governor Abbott, Wouldn’t know ozone depletion from holes in his head— Here’s what he said: “Boycott divesters! Earth’s getting […]

Doug Out

by Julia Griffin “Giant potato is not actually a potato, says Guinness World Records… A New Zealand couple who believed they had dug up the world’s largest potato in the garden of their small farm near Hamilton have had their dreams turned to mash.” —The Irish Times The giant tuber known as Doug Has left […]

Raja’s Funeral

by Julia Griffin “Sri Lanka to hold state funeral for beloved sacred elephant Raja” —The Guardian Call for the langurs and the leopards all; Let jungle fowl process with toque macaques; Sing, hornbills, for great Raja’s funeral. This sacred creature, more than ten feet tall, Could bear what must have broken others’ backs: Call for […]

A Flipper in Time

by Julia Griffin “California man survives frigid five-hour night swim with a friendly seal as his guide” —New York Post Arion had his dolphin, And Jonah had his whale (Sufficient to play golf in): When life blows up a gale, And every organ shivers Like splintering enamel, Hope God, or god, delivers A friendly ocean […]

All Wound Up

by Julia Griffin “Edgar Allan Poe’s pocket watch among donations to museum” —The Guardian Once within my mournful mansion, while I cursed my choice of scansion With my face against my pillow and my clothes upon the floor— While I burrowed, semi-sleeping, suddenly there came a beeping As of someone smugly cheeping, cheeping like a […]

Hive Mind

by Julia Griffin “Woman found trapped upside down in chimney rescued in California” —The Modesto Bee A woman found trapped upside down Inside a chimney tickles me (She’s safe—I’m not that sort of clown), But less than The Modesto Bee. Was she embarrassed? Was she warm? What was the truth behind the hype? Observers gathered […]

Weekend In New Zealand

by Julia Griffin for Lola Mills Lanou “New Zealand plays Barry Manilow to repel parliament protesters” —BBC News His name was Barry, he was a showman: He had yellow curly hair and his trousers were aflare; He sang of Sandra, and also Mandy; He wrote the songs that once we knew; Now in 2022, New […]