by Julia Griffin

“Woman found trapped upside down in chimney rescued in California”
—The Modesto Bee

A woman found trapped upside down
Inside a chimney tickles me
(She’s safe—I’m not that sort of clown),
But less than The Modesto Bee.

Was she embarrassed? Was she warm?
What was the truth behind the hype?
Observers gathered in a swarm
With exegetes of every stripe

Abuzz with questions—what of food?
And what of post-food? Luckily
They cannot voice concerns so crude
And write for The Modesto Bee.