by Julia Griffin

“Canterbury Cathedral defends silent discos against ‘rave in nave’ criticism …
The sell-out events… will see clubbers take to the nave in a ’90s-themed disco”
—The Independent

A rave in the nave?
When there’s souls they should save?
We’re wishing our bishops knew how to behave!

Were there balls in the stalls
Of the Abbey or Paul’s
When parishioners swished in their tailcoats and shawls?

Defiling the aisle
Causes Satan to smile.
“They’ll wreck it!” thinks Thomas à Becket, with bile.

These raps in the apse
Show the faith’s in collapse:
We’re urging our clergy: Act clerical, chaps!