by Julia Griffin

Hark the Herald Angels sing:
Why won’t cling film ever cling?
Peace on earth and mercy mild,
Where’s that aggravating child?
Joyful, all ye nations rise
Who’s allergic to mince pies?
With the angelic host proclaim:
What’s the Vicar’s Christian name?
Hark the Herald Angels sing:
Don’t forget—we need more string!

Hail the Heaven-born Prince of Peace!
Did I write to Henry’s niece?
Light and life to all he brings!
Should I buy some napkin rings?
Mild he lays his glory by,
Could the dog have one mince pie?
Born to raise the sons of earth
Can’t things cost what they are worth?
Hark the Herald Angels sing:
Every year, the self-same thing.