Abner Serd


The 33 1/3 Mile Wilderness

(with a nod to Robert W. Service)

The day we left from Caratunk,
On the Kennebec frontier,
The sun beat down
Till our skin turned brown,
As we shouldered all our gear.

We set our sights on Monson town—
An outpost way up north—
Just me and a duck
That I brought for luck,
Who thpoke with a lithp, of courth.

It was 33 1/3 hard miles
That the duck and I had to go:
When the sun did shine,
‘Twas a hundred and nine—
But at night it was forty below.

It was 33 1/3 hard miles
Through trackless wilderness,
And the state police
Made us sign a release,
So we wouldn’t sue God, I guess.

But we made it through to Monson town
Like dental floss through teeth—
Except for the duck,
Who ran out of luck
When he wouldn’t thign the releath.

On the Fundamental Interconnectedness Of All Beings

To be at one with Mother Gaia,
Let her smallest known pariah
Be a parta ya.

What better way to get acquainted
Than a sip of water tainted
With giardia?

Storyteller Abner Serd is the producer and host of “Tall Tales & Shaggy Dogs”—a podcast of short humor. You can subscribe to the podcast through the usual channels, or listen online at: http://abnerserd.com/feed.xml