His principle was phoolery;
He had no use for phact.
A truth that proved rephractory
He phractured, phluxed, and sacked.
We celebrate his phakery,
Aphlutter at his skill
In phlaunting phar-phetched knavery
And phielding phiery shill.
His phormula proved so rephined
That Phineas reigns still,
In phlashy phootwear phreshly shined
Phresh Barnums try to phill.
Though Homer doesn’t mention it,
Achilles scribbled notes
inside his famous targe, to wit:
Guard Heel. Protect the Boats.
Beat Hector! Lend Patroclus greaves.
Don’t Ever order Quiche.
Have barley Wine on hand for Heaves.
Keep Temper on a Leash.
Dan Campion has contributed verse to Light since its first issue. He has recent poems in Able Muse, After Hours, Blue Unicorn, Ekphrasis, Measure, The Midwest Quarterly, and the anthology Amethyst and Agate: Poems of Lake Superior.