Variations On A Theme by Parker
The Embarrassing Version
Men never make passes
At girls who leak gases.
The Climber’s Version
Men scarcely make passes
At girls in crevasses.
The Slimmer’s Version
Men rarely make passes
At girls who eat masses.
The Church-Crawler’s Version
Men sometimes make passes
At girls who rub brasses.
The Lamour Version
Men often make passes
At girls who wear grasses.
The Rabbie B. Version
Burns always made passes
At lassies wi’ tassies.
Unsweet Revenge
“Darwin’s chronic flatulence has been described
as a psychosomatic expression of his guilt for
displacing God as the prime mover.”
– Bookseller’s catalogue
Did a God who said, ‘‘Let there be light!”
And arranged the Red Sea’s timely parting
Really feel it befitted his might
To have Darwin left endlessly farting?
Jerome Betts lives in Devon, England. His verse, light or otherwise, has appeared in a wide variety of British magazines and anthologies as well as UK, European, and USA web venues such as Amsterdam Quarterly, Angle, Light, Lighten Up Online, The New Verse News, Per Contra, Snakeskin, and Tilt-A-Whirl.