by Orel Protopopescu
(With apologies to Gilbert and Sullivan)

He was the very model of a fine inspector general,
investigating fraud and waste, endemic and perennial,
who heard that Mike Pompeo used security to fetch his meals
and dog and son and dry-cleaned clothes, like menials with guns and wheels.

What’s worse, Mike cried “Emergency!” to peddle in the Emirates
and to the Saudis weapons seized by rebels backed by warring states.
Now Yemen’s bombed to bits, which to a lobbyist’s a “trade expense”
and Mike’s old West Point pal has moved from Raytheon to head Defense.

And there’s the matter of the dinners Pompous held for billionaires
to shore up lists of donors with the briefest nod to world affairs.
All this and more Steve Linick would have done his best to scrutinize
if Mike Pompeo hadn’t asked the Prez to cut him down to size.

Like Grimm (at Health) or Fine (Defense) and Atkinson (Intelligence),
Steve Linick was a victim of a fear of searing evidence.
Can Akard keep Steve’s place at State or Linick still be liminal,
or was he doomed as soon as he got wind of something criminal?