by Stephen Gold

“‘No more beardos’: Hegseth gives military branches 60 days to end shaving waivers for almost all US troops”
—Stars and Stripes

There is now a new regime, and as harsh as it may seem,
It’s your duty to be sharper than a knife
(Though we’re hoping you won’t notice
That it’s all to serve a POTUS
Who has never served a minute in his life).