Poems of the Week

Even Aliens Know That Touchscreens Suck

by Kaitlyn Spees

“[Astrophysicist] Avi Loeb… is planning an expedition to retrieve fragments of the meteor from the ocean floor. …
[He] is hoping to determine the object’s origins—even going so far as to make the extraordinary suggestion
that it could be a technological object created by aliens. …
[Loeb said:] ‘If you ask what my wish is, if it’s indeed of artificial origin, and there was some component of the object
that survived, and if it has any buttons on it, I would love to press them.’ …

‘This is what I would generously call a dubious plan,’ said Ethan Siegel, an astrophysicist and science communicator
who has vocally criticized Loeb’s past claims about aliens.”

Meteor, shmeateor
Loeb the astronomer’s
diving for alien
tech in the depths.

Even if nothing there’s
buttons from Earth have been
thoroughly pressed.