by Julia Griffin

For Jack, the Walrus Muse

“A very large sea lion is drawing onlookers to a pier popular among both other sea lions and tourists in San Francisco … [T]he name that has stuck is Chonkers … [He] weighs about 1,500 to 2,000 pounds, according to experts. … He is a Steller sea lion.
Sheila Chandor, who has been harbor master at Pier 39 since 1985, said Chonkers had been visiting the pier for about 15 years, but had previously stayed just a day or two at a time. … ‘I sort of hope we don’t end up with more,’ Ms. Chandor said, noting that the wooden floats were built for California sea lions, which weigh up to about 700 pounds.”
—The New York Times

Said Sheila to the Steller:
“Among these hoards of honkers,
You’re quite the fleshy feller:
That’s why we’ve called you ‘Chonkers.’

Alas, you’re much too heavy;
Less like a common otary,
More like a semi-Chevy
(If Chevys can be floatery).

The planks you choose to lie on
(You may find this surprising)
Are made of wood, not iron,
And soon may start capsizing.

We’re happy to permit you
A temporary visit,
But months of you in situ
Is not a visit, is it?