Poems of the Week

Further Adventures of Florida Woman

(last seen with a gator in her pants)

by Gail White

“A Florida woman freed herself from a camel by biting its testicles at the Tiger Truck Stop
in Grosse Tete, [Louisiana]…”
The Advocate

If you’re cornered by a camel
And you cannot climb the walls,
When the creature settles on you,
You can bite him in the balls.

If you’re looking at a camel,
Do not throw him doggy treats
Then go sneaking under fences
Just to notice what he eats.

Camels justly get offended
When you crawl into their pen,
And the one that’s sitting on you
May not let you up again.

Still, you have the useful knowledge
(Though applying it appalls)
That to get a camel going
You can bite him in the balls.