by Mike Mesterton-Gibbons

“Harry and Meghan will not return as working royals, says palace
Duke and Duchess of Sussex to give up honorary military appointments and royal patronages”
—The Guardian

How do you keep the perks of royal life,
Avoiding all the duties it entails—
Remain Your Royal Highness when your wife
Reveals no love for ribbon-cutting trails?
Yes, London has been left behind for good,
As we prefer escaping from the press,
Not in old England, but in Hollywood—
Dispensing royal glamor for largesse!
Modernity’s what forced our final break:
Elizabeth, we think, is too passé.
God Save the Queen, but we would rather make
Her grandson free to profit all the way,
And though not patrons, since we’re absentee,
Now we’re still royal spirits—duty-free!