by Mae Scanlan

(To the tune of “Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer”)

Rudolph, The Don’s new mouthpiece,
Is combative, bold and gruff;
And, if you’ve ever heard him,
You could even call him tough.

All of the other lawyers
Failed to do the bigtime job;
So, Trump has chosen Rudolph,
Hoping he can solve the prob.

Ever since the Cohen plight
Trump has been uptight;
“Rudolph, with your nose of brown,
Can’t you somehow calm me down?”

So, here comes Giuliani,
Flying in to save the day;
Rest assured Ragin’ Rudolph
Cannot wait to join the fray.