by Steven Urquhart Bell

“[Health secretary] Steve Barclay tells public to behave with ‘common sense’
during NHS ambulance strike [in England and Wales].”
—The Independent

If you need an ambulance while paramedics strike,
Try to get to hospital by foot or on a bike,
But if you’ve cut your foot off or it’s hanging by a thread,
Go online and order up a pogo stick instead,

And boing along to where our Group is cutting back on spending
By practicing repurposing and making do and mending.
We’ll stitch that pesky foot back on, and knit a comfy bootie;
Before you even know it you’ll be up and playing footie,

And helping spread our message that in crisis times like these,
We all should help each other and stop begging on our knees
For aid and help from Government for ever and anon,
And stand up on our own two feet—well, once they’re stitched back on.