by Alex Steelsmith

“[A]lcohol may negatively affect hormone levels including testosterone…
Excess alcohol intake …will lower your testosterone levels.”
—Verywellfit

“’[T]otal testosterone’ [often called ‘total T’] is the grand total of all the hormone
available in the bloodstream.”
—Gainswave.com

Higgledy-swiggledy
guzzling intoxicants
hobbles libido, the
experts agree.

Thus they might summarize,
epigrammatically:
Being teetotal can
boost total T.