by Steven Kent

“Rupert Murdoch reportedly divorced Jerry Hall by email”
—The Guardian

The subject line Re: marriage, then
The body reads, “Dear Jerry:
Conditions/terms were stated when
We both agreed to marry.
This union was performance-based,
Yet came to no fruition,
So now I choose to move in haste
And phase out your position.

Your contract I shall not renew,
Effective date next Monday.
We’ll skip the exit interview;
Please clear your desk by Sunday.
I’ll gladly recommend you, dear—
You’re pleasant, bright, and pretty—
But first you’ll have to sign off here.
(Attorneys, New York City).”