by Steven Kent

“At a Remote Scottish Pub, a Pint Worth Hiking 20 Miles”
—The New York Times

Across the Scotch Highlands did old Angus roam
In search of a pint or some whiskey.
Last call, and now all should be heading for home:
“I think I’ll stay here, lads—too risky.
My trek is a long one, and I’m a pit bissed
(I mean a bit pissed–I’ve drunk plenty).
This evening’s been one that I wouldn’t have missed;
I could stumble one mile, but not twenty!”