by Steven Kent

“McIlroy condemns ‘unacceptable’ Ryder Cup abuse…”
—The Guardian

Country Club hooligans? Here? Sacre bleu,
Save it for soccer in Spain.
Golf is a gentleman’s game—O, mon Dieu,
Bartenders, hide the champagne!

Ruffianism could leave someone hurt,
Thus we must take a firm stance:
Act with decorum (but wear a loud shirt
Coupled with hideous pants).