by Orel Protopopescu

“Though most Americans probably missed Trump’s false claim … that Alabama was likely to be hit by Hurricane Dorian, he spent the rest of the week highlighting his own embarrassing mistake, touting a map that had clearly been altered with a Sharpie, then repeatedly complaining that the media owes him an apology.”—New York Magazine

Oh, I came out from my Mamma with a Sharpie in my hand.
When I looked at Alabama, I made Dorian expand.
Alabama! Oh, don’t you blush for me!
Got no votes from the Bahamas. You’re my top priority.

I had a dream the other night, the storm obeyed my will,
but when I woke, the fake news said, it’s going northward still.
That made the comics laugh at me and score their stupid points,
but good folks in Alabama won’t stop oiling all my joints.

Alabama! Don’t you weep for me!
I will say your name forever till the idiots agree.