“[A retired bishop who] has unsuccessfully sought to be removed from the priesthood…
recently married a woman in a civil ceremony… [He has] said he wanted to be laicized,
or returned to the lay state… [which] would have relieved him of his celibacy obligations.”
—AP
Biggily wiggily
Vatican patriarchs
might have been more than a
little dismayed.
One of their formerly
celibatarian
bishops apparently
got himself layed.
“Elon Musk said X, formerly known as Twitter, will cover the legal costs of anyone
who gets in trouble with their boss for their activity on his social media platform.”
—NPR
So I’ll start tweeting potshots at my boss
to siphon off a bit of sweet Musk money.
“You look just like a giant albatross!”
I’ll tweet, a petty potshot at my boss—
But somehow I don’t think he’ll be too cross;
In fact I know he’ll even find it funny
Since we’ll have planned it out—me and my boss—
To help fund work with all that sweet Musk money.
“Chinese zoo denies its sun bears are humans dressed in costumes
Hangzhou zoo insists animals are real after video of one standing on hind legs
triggers online speculation…”
—The Guardian
“’Some people think I look too human when I stand up,’ the Hangzhou Zoo’s statement said.”
—The New York Times
I want this video’d, not versified,
The proof I’m bear, not human, ursified.
I stood upon my hind legs. What of that?
Has no one seen a meerkat acrobat?
I like at times to rest my foremost paws,
Or, possibly, to win some slight applause;
And if I waved, I merely meant to say:
“Thank you. I see you. Please, now, go away.”
“The new indictment alleges that Trump demanded that security footage at his Mar-a-Lago estate be deleted
after investigators visited… . The indictment says that in late June 2022, [Mar-a-Lago property manager]
De Oliveira… asked [another] employee how many days the server retained surveillance footage
and said ‘the boss’ wanted the server deleted.”
—AP
Lawyer up.
That’s the thing.
Down the cup.
Do not sing.
That’s the way.
Do not stool.
Boss will pay.
That’s the rule.
“Americans’ belief in angels (69%) is about on par with belief in heaven and the power
of prayer, but bested by belief in God or a higher power (79%). Fewer U.S. adults believe
in the devil or Satan (56%), astrology (34%), reincarnation (34%), and that physical things
can have spiritual energies, such as plants, rivers or crystals (42%).”
—AP
The Father, Son, and Holy Ghost are nowhere near content
On finding that they’re doubted now by 21%,
While Gabriel and Raphael and Michael all condemn
The fact that 31% now lack belief in them.
Stars, rivers, plants, and crystals find the figures less than nifty:
Percentage-wise their backers have decreased to under 50,
But Satan, scorned by 44%, is not concerned.
“A hundred years from now,” he purrs, “I think they’ll all have learned.”
Once I was a VP
That was fun
Kissing butt like a schmuck
Once I was a VP
Now I’m done
MAGA, can you spare a buck?
Thought I should be POTUS
Thought I’d run
But I’m poop out of luck
Thought I’d find some voters
More than one
MAGA, can you spare a buck?
Once, in matching suits
Gee, we looked neat
Sharing that uppity Trumpety fame
Always in cahoots
Until we got beat
And folks with a noose yelled my name
Oh, get over this hate stage
Geez Louise
I mean, hey, what the cluck
Put me on the debate stage
Pretty please
MAGA, can you spare a buck?
“‘There’s a 100% chance that Twitter is going to get sued over this by somebody,’ said trademark attorney
Josh Gerben, who said he counted nearly 900 active U.S. trademark registrations that already cover the letter X
in a wide range of industries.”
—Reuters
Musk has Xed the tweeting bluebird.
Twitter now is X’s ex-name.
Watch the feathers fly in court as
Rivals play the trademarked X game.
“Ukraine wants ships to keep exporting its grain despite Russian attacks. …
[This year, Ukraine has] shipped 32.9 million metric tons of grain to the world
and supplied 80% of the World Food Program’s wheat for humanitarian aid…”
—AP
Despite the war, they ship the wheat
and barley many millions eat;
the world is counting on Ukraine,
but Russia goes against the grain.
“Room-temperature superconductor ‘breakthrough’ met with scepticism:
Creating a material that perfectly conducts electricity at room temperature and pressure
would be a big deal, but a research team’s claims of creating one has attracted more scrutiny than optimism.”
—New Scientist
“So superconductors now needn’t be frosty
Nor crave enough pressure to flatten a car
Nor be too exclusively super high-costy?
What absolute rubbish!” says Lydia Tár.