Poems of the Week

Pate of Chips

by Stephen Gold

“Lawyers with brain chip implants will be better, faster and cheaper”
The Times

When matters judicial arise,
It may come as a nasty surprise
To discover one’s brain
Is a source of disdain,
And is far from its optimum size.

For a lawyer who isn’t bionic
Will be cruelly dismissed as moronic.
We shall live in an age
Where one cannot be sage
If one’s noggin is not electronic.

With this chip, I shall reason with ease,
And concoct irresistible pleas.
Though it won’t stop my clients
Exuding defiance
When computing the size of my fees!