Poems of the Week

Speaker of the House

by Julia Griffin

“Speaker McCarthy ousted in historic House vote…”

After Herbert Kretzmer

Speaker of the House, frantic for the job,
Clinging to my gavel till my fingers throb;
Cut a little deal, anything’ll do,
Sticking to the office like epoxy glue,
Teaming up with all who’ll have me,
Keeping scruples safe on ice;
What good are friends? I hate ’em;
Eight dumb votes, I’m pitched from Paradise!

Speaker of the House, shafted by the Fates,
Decommissioned, courtesy of Mad Matt Gaetz,
GOP forgets how I saved its rump,
Hammering those rioters but lauding Trump:
Everybody’s least-worst option,
Everybody’s empty suit;
Just mark my words verbatim:
Eight dumb votes, you all could get the boot!