by Julia Griffin

For Tam

“Wild bear pays surprise visit to bear enclosure at California zoo: ‘He was very polite’:
Sequoia park zoo said staff were doing an inspection when they saw a wild black bear
looking in at three captive bears”
—The Guardian

Oh yes, you thought he was “polite,” no doubt;
You found him quite the charmer, so refined,
Having no clue what he was on about:
Acquire some language and you’ll change your mind.
Feeling himself entitled to intrude,
He stood and stared at us, then scratched his head
(A gesture evidently meant as rude),
Opened his nasty, unwashed mouth, and said:
Hee, hee, hee! Are you locked in safe and tight?
I see they’ve pedicured your pretty feet!
So tell me, is your porridge cooked just right?
Who gets the widest quilt? The longest sheet?
And finally he chortled, to his fleas:
Let’s leave them to their Goldilocks-and-keys.