by Dan Campion

“Learning to fail is a skill like any other. Which means it takes practice.”
—“Here to Help” column in The New York Times

We learned to throw the towel in first,
Before the match begins.
My throw was judged by far the worst,
The champ of might-have-beens.

We wrote in cursive on the board.
They said mine was a fright.
In math was where I really scored.
Turns out I got none right.

At failure I’m a “prodigy,”
They say. I’ve got it made.
No need for practice, not for me!
They’re skipping me a grade.