by Ruth S. Baker
“Man requests sword fight with ex-wife and lawyer to settle legal dispute:
David Ostrom, 40, of Paola, Kansas asks judge for trial by combat in 12 weeks, so he has time to secure Japanese samurai swords”
Divorce proceedings need not be so hard
If proper measures are secured. En garde!
In twelve weeks’ time, if UPS accords,
I shall secure two wakizashi swords,
To end this disagreement with Bridgette
Concerning custody and taxes. Pret!
Upon the field of battle, we shall rend
Our souls from these our bodies. Trust me, friend,
A mortal joust will be a holiday
Compared with lawyers’ interviews. Allez!