“Long thought to be extinct in Kenya, giant pangolins are now being helped back from the brink” —The Guardian
Despondently angling for pangolins,
We learn that a few are still here!
So now conservationists dangle ins-
pirational stats, and we cheer.
Strange beauties, so squamous and famous:
All hail to you, keratin kings!
Mankind feels enchantment, the same as
Is sparked when a nightingale sings.
You’re saved from the brink of extinction—
But please, do not rush to relax;
Preserve yourselves clear of that brink: shun
Your fans, and keep watching your backs.
“Kangaroo punches police officer in face as it is captured after weekend on the run in Canada… [The staff sergeant] said the officers contacted the kangaroo’s handlers and grabbed it by the tail, as instructed.” —The Guardian
A renegade she-kangaroo,
On the run from a Canada zoo,
Punched the face of a cop
Who, to prompt her to stop,
Grabbed her tail. (I’d have clocked him one too.)
“The British Museum has solicited the public’s help in finding an estimated 2,000 artifacts that had been stolen from the institution’s collection over the course of several years.” —Time
“Rishi Sunak cancelled his meeting with the Greek prime minister after [the minister] told the BBC
on Sunday he wanted… the Elgin Marbles… returned from the British Museum to Greece.” —BBC
Those insolent Greeks who decry us
Are really insufferably pious
To claim they’re bereft;
When we talked about theft
We clearly meant from us, not by us.
Mike Pence “wrote in his book that he told Trump, ‘You know, I don’t think I have the authority to change the outcome’ of the election on Jan. 6. But Pence allegedly told Smith’s investigators that the comma should have never been placed there. According to sources, Pence told Smith’s investigators that he actually meant to write in his book that he admonished Trump, ‘You know I don’t think I have the authority to change the outcome,’ suggesting Trump was well aware of the limitations of Pence’s authority days before Jan. 6…” —ABC News
So, did he know
he was guilty, or not?
One little comma
can matter a lot.
“Bristol Airport under fire over ‘bus shelter’ prayer room” —The Independent
Even though I’m a very nervous flyer,
I don’t think I would say a prayer to God.
It’s not I don’t believe in something higher.
I’m not afraid my friends would think I’m odd.
I don’t care if the room is like a shelter.
I don’t care if I have to stand and queue.
I’m not afraid I’d meet a Bible Belter.
It’s if I met the Captain and the crew.
“Young humpback whale leaps out of Seattle bay dazzling onlookers The whale breached for about 40 minutes, also performing several pectoral fin slaps and dives…” —The Guardian
A young humpback whale erupts from the Bay,
With pectoral fin slaps and dives,
Eclipsing the ships with its crazy display,
Its foamy cetacean high-fives.
And there, on the iPad or phone or TV,
While prices and politics spike,
A lone living creature shows all who can see
What happiness still might be like.
“Officials estimate that about 170 hippos… now roam Colombia, and the population could grow to 1000 by 2035, posing a serious threat to the country’s ecosystem.” —The New York Times
Within this Latin nation,
by 2035,
the hippopopulation
could be in overdrive.
The numbers keep on soaring
and posing threats of doom
with hippocrits ignoring
the hippo in the room.
Who knows where this is leading?
We have a lot to lose,
so daily I’ll be reading
the hippopotenews.
“Scientists say mystery of how red wine headaches occur may be solved… A flavanol called quercetin… is processed in the body into various substances. One of these, quercetin glucuronide, turned out to be particularly effective at blocking the enzyme that converts acetaldehyde into acetate.” —The Guardian
A flavanol known as quercetin,
As is clear to the veriest cretin,
Turns its glucuronide
On acetaldehyde,
Which explains why red wine does your tête in.
