by Alex Steelsmith

“A turtle crashed through the windshield of a car on Interstate 95 near Port Orange, Florida. …
What may surprise you though, is this bizarre accident has happened around here before.”
—CNN

Hurtledy turtledy
Florida’s Interstate,
putting its motorists’
nerves to the test,

shatters their windshields with
testudinarious
missiles, which renders them
shell-shocked at best.