by Dan Campion

“U.S. Stocks Rise to Records on Stimulus Bets”
—The Wall Street Journal

Friends, step right up and place your bets
On fiscal stimulation!
With acts of Congress, largesse jets
Across a grateful nation;

Stocks “rise to records.” Think of that!
Don’t get stuck in a queue
For bread and milk and bacon fat—
Next Buffett could be you!