by Steven Kent

“Capitol Rioter Caught After FBI Finds Recording of Him Boasting to Uber Driver”
—The Guardian

Hey buddy, I don’t mean to boast,
But history was made today!
And in the future I can say
I served where I was needed most.

A Minuteman, to be real blunt,
Might look and act a lot like me.
I strode with purpose valiantly
When I got summoned to the front.

We knew our chance would soon be gone;
The time had come to fight like men.
We smashed our way inside and then—
Hey buddy, is that camera on?