by Steven Kent

“ICE entices new recruits with patriotism pitch and pledge of $50,000 signing bonuses”
—The Guardian

Come sign with ICE; we’ll pay your price,
With bonus for employment.
Our squad’s elite—you’ll rule the street,
You’ll cosplay cops, raid schools and shops.
Tear kids away from moms today
For duty and enjoyment!

Men, sign with ICE, that’s our advice
To patriots in waiting:
Come show your stuff (we like it rough).
We’ll make you feel your manhood’s real—
We always ask you wear a mask
And tough-guy armor plating.

So sign with ICE—we don’t play nice
Or follow legal stricture.
Our budget’s large with Noem in charge;
We’re spreading fear both far and near;
It’s might makes right, it’s black and white,
And that’s our kind of picture!