Poems of the Week

Implausible Deniability

by Susan McLean

Blustery, flustery,
President Tweetybird
thinks his election went
fine, on the whole.

Counterintelligence
isn’t his enemy.
Now we have learned that it’s
simply his goal.

ShipRex

by Mae Scanlan

The State Department’s sinking fast;
It has no sails, it has no mast.
It has no skipper, has no crew,
And no one knows just what to do.
It’s foundered since it left the docks;
Diplomacy is on the rocks.
Now all that’s bad, but here’s the chiller:
Soon, there’s going to be no Tiller.

More on Moore

by Scott Mahler

Judge Roy Moore,
Your excuses are simply a bore.
One thing is clear as your lies unravel:
You wanted to bang more than just your gavel.

Riyadh Reformer

by Chris O’Carroll

Dynasty-phantasy,
Saudi Arabia
Frowns on corruption, we
Now come to learn.

This ain’t your grandfather’s
Kleptotheocracy.
This Prince has money and
Cousins to burn.

Does Not Compute

by Phil Huffy

Matt Lauer pushed a button
to lock his office door.
Siri wouldn’t do it;
she’d heard it all before.

Trickle Down

by Bruce McGuffin

They’re giving us trickle-down tax cuts
To fill up the working man’s cup.
But gravity can’t affect money
And somehow it always flows up.

Garrison Keillor

by Charles Ghigna

Garrison Keillor
Liked to feel her.
He thought he was Don Juan.

But he was not,
And he got caught,
And now he’s woe be gone.

Grab ‘Em

by Chris O’Carroll

Plan A, dismiss it as locker room chat.
Plan B, deny that I ever said that.

Yet More White House Clerihews

by Mark Granier

Mueller
the slow, gradual unspooler,
could not be cooler
or crueller.

Sanders
frowns and never meanders
off script, barely holding on by the skin
of her spin.

Ryan Had a Little Plan

by Orel Protopopescu

Ryan had a little plan,
little plan, little plan,
Ryan had a little plan
to cut us at the knees.

Everywhere that Congress went,
Congress went, Congress went,
everywhere his Congress went
they lied and shot the breeze.

Why do they love their donors so,
donors so, donors so?
Why do they love their donors so?
bewildered children cried.

Why, it’s their life support you know,
sport, you know, sport, you know?
That’s the only sport they know,
their parents all replied.