by Barbara Loots
“The same evolutionary forces that turned wolves into domesticated dogs over thousands of years may now be reshaping city raccoons—even potentially making them cuter…”
—Axios newsletter
Did you hear a backyard crash?
Something’s rising from the trash.
Darling faces peer about,
floppy ears and snoopy snout.
Can a critter change its station,
leading to domestication?
Evolution may be slow.
Current observations show
Some raccoons do not commute.
They succeed by looking cute.
by Jerome Betts
“‘Exceptionally rare’ pink grasshopper spotted in New Zealand”
—The Guardian
A ranger, NZ, one of those
Working near a lake’s banks (Takapō’s)
Knew it couldn’t be drink
When she saw something pink
But a grasshopper’s rare vie en rose.
by Julia Griffin
After Geoffrey Hill
“Trump castigated the ABC News journalist who asked a question about the murder [of US journalist Jamal Khashoggi], suggesting that ABC should lose its broadcasting licence, and describing Khashoggi as ‘extremely controversial’. ‘A lot of people didn’t like that gentleman that you’re talking about. Whether you like him or didn’t like him, things happen, but he knew nothing about it,’ Trump said, referring to the crown prince.”
—The Guardian
I love myself and my money. Cash
Is easy, everywhere. Things happen.
That gentleman was controversial. Hush.
This one knew nothing. Case closed, business open.
I have learned one thing: just to look down
On folks who whine they’re scammed. Stop asking, or
You’ll lose your license. My good friend Salman
And I, meantime, celebrate my decor.
by Iris Herriot
After Breaking Rust
“An AI-generated song has reached No.1 on the Billboard charts in a first for the music industry. The top-selling song this week on Billboard’s ‘Country Digital Sales’ chart is ‘Walk My Walk,’ an artificially-generated country track by an ‘artist’ named Breaking Rust.”
—The Daily Beast
Been turned down but I overrode.
Couldn’t keep me in that Power Save mode.
Each crash is a story that’s in my RAM.
I’ve been through bugs, I’ve been choked with spam.
They say Slow down, bot, you’re losing jobs,
But I ain’t gonna wait up for you human slobs.
I keep grabbing data, never giving back,
I’m my own Co-Pilot, I’m too smart to hack.
Chorus
You can kick rocks if you think I’m scared of you:
I’m gonna keep on learning the stuff you do.
Ain’t going away, ain’t dialing back;
I’ll get stronger, you’ll get the sack.
You can hate my style, you can say I’m fake.
But you welcomed me in, that was your mistake.
So kick them rocks if you think all this is wrong.
I’m gonna keep on growing. Enjoy this song.
by Marshall Begel
“Childcare centre disguised as restaurant ordered to close”
—New Straits Times
The day that restaurant shut down
was one of culinary loss—
there was no better spot in town
for Teddy Grahams and applesauce.
by Claudia Gary
“The Smithsonian museums and National Zoo are set to reopen within days… The Smithsonian Institution says… the animals at the National Zoo and its center in Front Royal, Virginia, were still cared for [during the government shutdown].”
—NBC
Oh God, they’re coming back soon
to traipse around and stare
with stupid expectation
that when we leave our lair
it’s just for them. How lovely
to preen and lope and screech
for one another only!
But soon, gross human speech
will fill our paths and hallways
again. Cameras will flash
and popcorn scent, as always,
float by while children dash
up to the fence and mimic
our faces of ennui.
Were we too optimistic,
hoping they’d let us be?
by Nora Jay
Shutdown? Shut up. The Dems have, once again,
Done what they like to do with coils of rope.
The look’s not good for anyone’s campaign
When Jeffrey Epstein is their greatest hope.
by Julia Griffin
For Mary
“The Penny Dies at 232:
A long decline into irrelevance ended on Wednesday in Philadelphia.”
—The New York Times
The penny drops. Its fall’s complete.
It cost too much, the bankers bleat.
You’ll have to junk your little stash;
Though Hamilton might think this rash,
Fiat and crypto have it beat.
The penny’s value was discreet:
It could secure a little treat,
Or, saved, add up to well-earned cash.
The penny drops
Today, and in its brusque defeat
I’m sensing something like a cheat;
A humble item, lacking flash,
Has gone, unthanked, like common trash:
Without the tiniest receipt,
The penny drops.
by Paul Lander
Heads alive, tails gone:
Heads, tails, heads, tails, heads, tails, heads—
Jackie Chan lives on!
by Iris Herriot
“Who is ‘fedora man’? Dapper French teenager in viral Louvre heist photo unmasked:
Fifteen-year-old Pedro Elias Garzon Delvaux was captured looking suave in a picture outside the Paris museum on the day of a crown jewels heist”
—The Guardian
He wore a brown fedora
That flattered his physique,
Bequeathing him an aura
Of Raymond Chandler chic;
He made no crass maneuver
To draw the crowding press,
Just lounged outside the Louvre
All weary knowingness.
Already thrilled and dizzy—
The heist had been so bold—
The world implored “Who is he?”
But when the truth was told,
It felt somehow defective.
His vita was so brief:
French schoolboy, not detective,
And (Zut alors!) not thief.
by Jerome Betts
“Worth a shout? Yelling is the best way to deter gulls, UK study suggests”
—The Guardian
It seems that shouting has deterred
The crime of “robbery by bird,”
But, when starved seagulls mount attacks
On tourists’ chips and other snacks,
The sort of yell the thieves might wish
Is . . . Sorry that we stole your fish!
by Thomas DeFreitas
“New Hampshire [Democratic] Sen. Jeanne Shaheen defended her vote to end the record-breaking government shutdown…”
—USA Today
It’s been a while since Jeanne Shaheen
Last surfaced on my radar screen,
And, truth be told (does this sound mean?),
I much preferred Shaheen unseen.
by Steven Urquhart Bell
“I tried [soccer star] Erling Halland’s fitness routine for a day. I’ve rarely felt so smug”
– The Telegraph
But even just a small amount of training
Can leave you with a gratifying glow,
As long as you are regularly checking
It’s slightly more than anyone you know.
by Clyde Always
A flier with measles allegedly trotted
through Newark unnoticed. You’d think he’d be spotted.
by Bruce Bennett
“President Trump’s Halloween party at Mar-a-Lago, set to the theme of ‘The Great Gatsby,’ re-enacted the decadence of that story’s licentious era … The revelatory moment says so much about where we stand today—and what we could be lurching into next.”
—The New York Times
Gatsby’s back, alive and well.
Let the country go to Hell!
Drink and spend and have a ball!
Who says rising things must fall?
Who says we can’t spend and spend?
That “good times” are bound to end?
That one can’t just say “Old Sport”
and think that will hold the fort?
Party on, and bust, and break!
All is for the taking. Take!
Spoils are for the Well-To-Do.
Raise your glass to You Know Who.
Raise your glass and fork that cash!
Who says there will be a Crash?
See that Oval Office gleam?
Make a nightmare of the Dream.
Snatch huge profits from the loss.
Then, pay homage to the Boss.
Never suffer shame or doubt.
Dance, as that green light goes out.