by Steven Kent

“‘Incredibly intelligent, highly elusive’: US faces new threat from Canadian ‘super pig'”
—The Guardian

Calamities on every side beset,
Yet we shall face our foe with no regret.
Today we take the fight right to the field,
Prepared to slay the swine who will not yield.
We’ll wait for our commander’s mighty war sign,
And then we’ll bring the battle to the porcine.
Once more unto the breech, dear friends, no fakin’;
This Crispin’s Day we’re bringing home the bacon!